Caryn G | 17th August 2022 | Self-Improvement

“When you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it.” -Paulo Coelho There are many reasons why you might decide to cut back or quit drinking. You might want freedom of choice so you can control what you put into your body because you’re working on improving your health & fitness levels. Maybe you crave financial freedom, which means you need to stop wasting your money on booze and put it into your savings or start that business you always dreamed of. If you’re creative, maybe you’ve figured out that if you cut back on mindless drinking time, you would have more time-freedom to turn your dream into reality. Whatever your motivating factor is, you’re going to need some inspiration to keep you on track to achieve your goal. So let’s dive into some great inspirational quotes from people who know what it’s like to face challenges and succeed. “You are never too old to set new goals or to dream a new dream.” - C.S.Lewis It’s never too late to make a change in your life. I was 59 when I finally quit drinking and my friend was 73. We both had decades of alcohol history under our belt. We were masters in the f**cked up art of drinking. If you’re ready to quit drinking, you’re ready to quit! Young or old, age makes no difference. Prioritise your freedom and take your first step by making a decision to improve your health, wealth, & freedom of choice today. “The only way to do great work is to love what you do.” -Steve Jobs Find something that inspires you and use it as motivation to quit drinking. Look for something to fall in love with. This can be anything from jigsaw puzzles to skydiving. When you are engrossed in something you love, your desire for the booze fades. This is also a good time to fall in love with yourself. Recently, I attended a Wildfit coaching call. We were discussing the need to take care of our mind and body. One attendee explained it beautifully when she said, “Selfish is the new unselfish!” So get selfish and fall in love with yourself and life. If you’re passionate about something, then it will be easier to stay committed to quitting alcohol. So find your passion and use it to fuel your motivation! Get passionate about your new life, fall in love with yourself & picture the new you one year from now. Healthy, happy, sober! “The best way to find out if you can trust somebody is to trust them.” -Ernest Hemingway This is a big one. At some level, you probably don’t trust yourself. Maybe you don’t trust yourself to stay sober. Maybe you don’t trust yourself to make the right decisions in life. This is common amongst drinkers. We often start drinking out of a sense of lack, so it’s not surprising we don’t trust ourselves completely. Trust is built and not manufactured. Start building trust in yourself by taking baby steps. One small wise decision at a time, like a fresh homemade green vegetable juice before you go out to drink and a glass of water between drinks. Remember, the only failure is the failure to try. Everything else is market research. So trust yourself and believe in your ability to change your circumstances, your habits and your life.The more practice you get making wise choices, the better you become. In the future, you will look back and you won’t even recognise the person you are now. “Success is not final, failure is not fatal: It is the courage to continue that counts.” -Winston Churchill For most people, cutting back on the booze or quitting alcohol is a journey. Some people are lucky, they can make the decision to stop and give up the next day. There is no journey. They just teleport themselves into the future and adopt their future personality. People who do this often have the ability to make clear decisions in other areas of their life too. So when it comes to booze, they can make a clear distinction between the old self and the new, improved non-drinki...

Caryn G | 10th August 2022 | Self-Improvement

I can’t live without you. You are always there for me. Whenever I’m feeling down, you are always there by my side. When I’m feeling anxious and worried, you comfort me and when I’m happy you’re there to celebrate with me. I’m so lucky to have you in my life. I am blessed to be living in such a fairy tale. Hello. Wake up! Don’t you know that fairy tales always have a villain? If you’re reading this, you’re probably in a relationship with alcohol. Chances are it’s not going to end well. Alcohol always wins and we always lose. It might take a pound of flesh, your money, your family, your life. The only thing for sure is there’s no happy ending in sight. Living in a Fairy tale? For many of us, alcohol is like a bad lover out of a Grimms’ fairy tale. A relationship that starts so innocently but inevitably turns into a waking nightmare. Slowly but surely, we discover that alcohol is not our twin flame, the light of our life, the rock that supports us and stands by us through thick and thin. Instead, we’ve been seduced by a wolf masquerading in sheep’s clothing. The malevolent one hiding in plain sight slowly but surely devouring us from the inside out. The more time we spend with them, the more we need them. We find ourselves longing for their company. We want them at lunch; we want them after a stressful day at work; we want them when we have dinner or when we watch tv and we want one last brief encounter before we go to sleep. And, some of us want a cheeky one in the morning too! Days, months and years go past. Until one day we start to notice we no longer enjoy their company as much. Sometimes we regret being with them. They drag us down and make us feel bad about ourselves. We notice our head hurts more often after we’ve been with them. We’re too tired to get up in the morning because we sleep less soundly. Our weight has increased and our health has decreased. We’re not always there at work and sometimes we let our family & friends down because we prioritised our lover alcohol over and above everyone and everything else. Our dreams of making it have long since been abandoned and our life is full of drama of the wrong kind.   The Spell Is Broken When the fog clears, we realise too late just how much power we have given to our bad, bad lover. We are no longer the master of our own ship. They are. Everything we do revolves around them. Even though the love has gone, we just can’t seem to kick them into touch. Anyone who’s ever had a bad lover will know that sometimes it’s just so goddamn hard to break the spell. Alcohol is like the Tinder Swindler of the dating world. It’s gonna seduce you and take your money, mind, body and soul and leave you heartbroken. They’re going to walk away once they’ve had their way and leave you crying in the gutter. Important Questions Don’t feel ashamed or embarrassed or guilty if you’ve climbed into bed with the wrong lover. Feel glad that you have finally found them out. If you’re really not convinced if they are good or bad, ask yourself these questions: I know what I can do with a bad lover. But do I actually know how far I can go and what I can be without them? Creating A New Story There was a time when alcohol was my lover. I could say that sometimes he was a good lover, but that would just be my pride talking and my shame and embarrassment hiding. He was never a good lover. He kept me playing small; he stopped me from growing. He stopped me from learning how to process and deal with emotions, but most of all, he led me to make some incredibly stupid and ill informed choices. But I’m not bitter. He was a bad lover but a good teacher and without him I wouldn’t be able to show up here and help you kick your bad lover out of your bed. To kick their sorry ass into the gutter so you can grow, and be stronger and better than ever before. Now I have a new lover. Do you want to know who it is? It’s me! Self love is ...

Caryn G | 18th June 2022 | Self-Improvement

Never drinking & staying sober is a skill. No one ever tells you the real truth about drinking when you’re young. There isn’t a class in high school, college or university where a professor stands up and says, “Understand this one big point: learning about alcohol is vital if you want to be a success in life. Everything important you do in life requires research. What university to go to? What job? What shirt goes with what jeans? What’s the best phone? So doesn’t it make sense to research alcohol first?” Instead, alcohol remains this massive unknown in most people’s everyday life. They don’t know how to control it. They don’t know how to secretly drink more of it. They don’t know how long it will be before they can’t function at work. They don’t know how to get more money to spend on it. They don’t know how to give it up. They don’t know how to live without it. And that’s a massive problem for anyone to live with. 11 months, 25 days and 13 hours ago, I gave up drinking. I did this because I wanted to but also to support my friend, who was having a hard time giving up. Not for the first time, I made up my mind to quit. But this time I asked a Wildfit coach for help and he suggested the book by Annie Grace, This Naked Mind (I highly recommend this). It turned out that making a concrete decision, taking positive action and having a non-drinking friend were exactly the 3 things I needed to get started successfully. I would later discover that getting started wasn’t the hard thing. As time ticked by, I realised that I needed a foundation of knowledge and strategies to put in place. Which is what I’d like to share with you today. Knowledge is power which is why I'd like to share three important points that will help you navigate giving up alcohol. The quicker you understand these points and plan for them, the easier it will be for you to stay sober. 1. Alcohol Endings and Sober Beginnings One of the first things to expect is that your old alcohol infused drinking life will end. If you've been drinking for a long time it will have a big impact on you. It’s like losing a loved one. You’re going to go into a period of mourning because the love of your life- alcohol is no longer around. You will want your ex back. And you are going to be given constant reminders and prompts to start drinking again. Every time you watch TV, you’re going to see your ex. Every time you go out you will think about your ex and if you meet up with your drinking buddies, they will really push you to drink again. The best way to get over your ex is to get under a new one. The more you can focus on a new hobby or building a new you, the better it will be. Life is about choice. You can choose where you focus. 2. Friends or Frenemies? When you give up drinking you quickly discover that your best friend was the booze. Your second best friends were the people you drank with in the pub. When you quit, you will be faced with the reality that you have nowhere to hide from yourself. You’re going to discover that you have built your daily habits around your ex and it’s going to be a shock. Focus on building new habits that support the growth of the new you. Remember, you want to plan for the long run. We’re not talking about change for a few days, we’re talking about the rest of your life. Get serious about it! 3. Planning For Success If you want lasting sobriety you have to plan for it. This is a huge mindset shift, and it took me some time to understand it. As a drinker planning for life wasn’t a concept I was really familiar with because drink takes care of everything. Drink is always the finale. Got a problem? Solve it with a drink. Feeling happy? Celebrate. Matthew Childs gave a Ted talk called 9 Life Lessons From Rock Climbing. Lesson number 3 is, have a plan. He says, “Often what happens is you’re planning so hard for like, “How do I get through the hardest part?...

Caryn G | 05th August 2024 | Health

Welcome to Join Sober: Your Guide to Thriving in an Alcohol-Infused World Welcome to Join Sober! If you have ever felt like you are swimming upstream in a culture completely obsessed with drinking, you are in the exact right place. This website is your dedicated sanctuary—a space filled with raw, unfiltered, and life-changing Quit Lit designed to help you reclaim your power, break free from the trap of alcohol, and finally start living the life you aspire to. Whether you are here because you are starting to question your relationship with alcohol, looking for actionable ways to stop, or seeking a massive upgrade in your personal growth, sobriety and happiness are closer than you think. It’s time to join the Sober Revolution. What You’ll Find on Join Sober To help you navigate your journey, our articles are grouped by exactly how you are feeling and what you need right now. Dive into our core pillars to get started: 1. Brutal Truths for the Sober Curious Before you can change your habits, you have to smash through the denial. In this section, we dive into the unvarnished realities of alcohol. We explore the profound impacts of drinking on your Physical Health—from disrupted sleep to toxic inflammation—as well as the deep Mental Health & Psychology of addiction, exposing the chemical anxiety ("hangxiety") and dopamine crashes that alcohol leaves in its wake. If you are ready to see alcohol for what it truly is, start here. 2. Strategies to Quit When you are ready to put down the glass, you don't need vague inspiration—you need practical, real-world tactics. This section is packed with actionable roadmaps and immediate coping mechanisms to help you survive the early days, set firm boundaries, and take back control of your life. 👉 Get started right now: [3 Essential Quit Drinking Strategies for Self-Medicating With Alcohol] 3. Dealing with Failure & Setbacks Let's be completely honest: recovery is rarely a straight line. If you have stumbled, relapsed, or felt the crushing weight of falling off the wagon, you are not alone, and you have nothing to be ashamed of. This corner of the site focuses heavily on emotional resilience and Self-Improvement. We unpack the psychological traps of shame and give you the tools to treat yourself with compassion, dust yourself off, and turn a setback into a setup for long-term success. 4. Life After Alcohol Sobriety isn't about deprivation; it's about absolute freedom. Here, we celebrate the incredible rewards of long-term sober living. We talk about navigating Sober Relationships, handling peer pressure at social events, finding your true identity, and building a meaningful life that you don't feel the need to escape from. 👉 See what's waiting for you: [1 Thing You Notice Once You Stop Drinking] Shift Your Mindset & Take the First Step The hardest part of giving up alcohol isn't changing what is in your glass—it’s changing how you think. If you want to successfully quit drinking for good, you have to stop viewing sobriety as a punishment and start viewing it as the ultimate promotion. 👉 Read our guide on how to flip the switch: [Use This Mindset Shift If You Want to Quit Drinking] Your sober journey begins the moment you decide you've had enough of living in a fog. Explore our Quit Lit, find the stage that matches your heart today, and let's build your alcohol-free dream life together. 🚀  Join The Sober Revolution Here                ...

Caryn G | 19th August 2022 | Health & Psychology

It’s no secret that we live in a culture that encourages drinking. That's why you need keys to help you quit drinking. Whether it’s beer commercials during the match or wine pairings at a fancy restaurant, there are endless opportunities to drink alcohol and be rewarded with the approval of your friends, family, and colleagues to boot. And while there’s nothing wrong with enjoying a glass of wine or a cold beer on occasion, if you are reading this there’s a very good chance that your drinking is an issue, it’s no longer fun and it’s a habit you want to break. You are not alone. Understand Your Conditioning Many people find themselves drinking more than they intended. This is no surprise. This is an expected consequence of drinking alcohol. Alcohol manufacturers want you to do this. How else are they going to keep increasing their profits year after year? We drink more because we’ve been conditioned to believe that drinking is normal, and even necessary, in social situations. We’re taught that it’s rude to refuse a drink, and that alcohol is the best way to relax and have fun. We don’t question it because it’s what society expects of us. As a result, we often end up drinking more than we really want to. Sometimes it’s more than we can afford, not only in terms of money wasted but also in terms of our health. It might start off with hangovers after a night out when we really push the boat out with our friends, but then it starts to increase as we begin drinking more and more at home. You know it’s the wrong thing to do, but you just can’t break the cycle. Every night you tell yourself you won’t have a drink. But you do. You try to reason with yourself, but the truth is you broke another promise to yourself and the guilt and the shame are starting to eat you up inside and you don’t know how to climb out of the hole you are digging. Your will power has gone on permanent vacation and you just don’t have the strength to say no to a drink. If any of this sounds familiar, maybe it’s time to give yourself a break and try a different approach. Here’s 3 steps you can try to help you regain your power and live a healthier, happier life. Stop Trying To Use Willpower This may sound a little controversial and counterintuitive, but seriously if you want lasting results, you gotta master your programming first. Give up trying to rely on willpower alone. I tried for years to quit drinking by using my willpower, as did my mum. It didn’t work. The only thing I got was extra guilt and shame, both of which combined to make me feel like a loser. Willpower is only really effective when your body is fit and healthy and you are not stressed, tired or emotional. Until then Willpower is pretty ineffective in breaking down bad drinking habits and years of being conditioned to drink. Bolster Your Body & Mind Focus on filling your body with the good stuff before you try to cut out the bad stuff. This means drinking more water & eating plenty of fruits, vegetables, and lean proteins. It is also important to get enough healthy fats, such as Omega-three fatty acids. These nutrients will help to reduce inflammation in the body and support detoxification. If you aim to drink 1.5l of water a day, this will really help flush out the toxins from your system. We all know alcohol robs your body of essential vitamins and nutrients, which is why it’s really important to double up on the good stuff. Not only will it help to stabilise blood sugar levels and give you more energy, it will help to neutralise one of your hungers, which will make it easier to use your willpower to help you quit drinking. Details from the Sleep foundation Get More Sleep Easier said than done right? This is because alcohol really screws up the quality of your sleep. Not only do you have to keep getting up to go to the toilet there’s the additional problems of hot sweats as the liver gets to work to remove ...

Caryn G | 17th August 2022 | Self-Improvement

“When you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it.” -Paulo Coelho There are many reasons why you might decide to cut back or quit drinking. You might want freedom of choice so you can control what you put into your body because you’re working on improving your health & fitness levels. Maybe you crave financial freedom, which means you need to stop wasting your money on booze and put it into your savings or start that business you always dreamed of. If you’re creative, maybe you’ve figured out that if you cut back on mindless drinking time, you would have more time-freedom to turn your dream into reality. Whatever your motivating factor is, you’re going to need some inspiration to keep you on track to achieve your goal. So let’s dive into some great inspirational quotes from people who know what it’s like to face challenges and succeed. “You are never too old to set new goals or to dream a new dream.” - C.S.Lewis It’s never too late to make a change in your life. I was 59 when I finally quit drinking and my friend was 73. We both had decades of alcohol history under our belt. We were masters in the f**cked up art of drinking. If you’re ready to quit drinking, you’re ready to quit! Young or old, age makes no difference. Prioritise your freedom and take your first step by making a decision to improve your health, wealth, & freedom of choice today. “The only way to do great work is to love what you do.” -Steve Jobs Find something that inspires you and use it as motivation to quit drinking. Look for something to fall in love with. This can be anything from jigsaw puzzles to skydiving. When you are engrossed in something you love, your desire for the booze fades. This is also a good time to fall in love with yourself. Recently, I attended a Wildfit coaching call. We were discussing the need to take care of our mind and body. One attendee explained it beautifully when she said, “Selfish is the new unselfish!” So get selfish and fall in love with yourself and life. If you’re passionate about something, then it will be easier to stay committed to quitting alcohol. So find your passion and use it to fuel your motivation! Get passionate about your new life, fall in love with yourself & picture the new you one year from now. Healthy, happy, sober! “The best way to find out if you can trust somebody is to trust them.” -Ernest Hemingway This is a big one. At some level, you probably don’t trust yourself. Maybe you don’t trust yourself to stay sober. Maybe you don’t trust yourself to make the right decisions in life. This is common amongst drinkers. We often start drinking out of a sense of lack, so it’s not surprising we don’t trust ourselves completely. Trust is built and not manufactured. Start building trust in yourself by taking baby steps. One small wise decision at a time, like a fresh homemade green vegetable juice before you go out to drink and a glass of water between drinks. Remember, the only failure is the failure to try. Everything else is market research. So trust yourself and believe in your ability to change your circumstances, your habits and your life.The more practice you get making wise choices, the better you become. In the future, you will look back and you won’t even recognise the person you are now. “Success is not final, failure is not fatal: It is the courage to continue that counts.” -Winston Churchill For most people, cutting back on the booze or quitting alcohol is a journey. Some people are lucky, they can make the decision to stop and give up the next day. There is no journey. They just teleport themselves into the future and adopt their future personality. People who do this often have the ability to make clear decisions in other areas of their life too. So when it comes to booze, they can make a clear distinction between the old self and the new, improved non-drinki...

Caryn G | 08th August 2022 | psychology

Have you ever wondered why some people can quit drinking easily whilst for others it seems impossible?   There is a lot of debate surrounding the topic of alcohol addiction and whether it should be classified as a disease. Some people believe that alcoholism is a result of genetics or other outside factors, while others insist that it is a choice that individuals make. What if it’s neither? What if you’ve been conditioned and brainwashed into drinking and the only way you can stop or cut down is if you change your programming? I know many of you are thinking I am some sort of nutter right now. But hear me out. In this article, we will explore both sides of the argument and come to our own conclusion on the matter. Alcoholism is a very real and serious problem. It can lead to financial ruin, job loss, relationship problems, and even death. However, just because something is a serious problem does it mean that it should be classified as a disease? There are studies supporting both viewpoints. The general definition of alcoholism also known as alcohol addiction, is a chronic disease of the brain that’s characterised by compulsive decision-making, impulsive behaviour and relapse. It’s triggered by genetic and environmental factors, and it causes biological changes in the brain that make abstaining from alcohol nearly impossible without medical treatment. Medical Intervention If you think of Alcohol Addiction as a disease and accept the definition, then most people will tell you that the only way to get rid of or cure this condition is by going through doctors and drug companies. This is a big win for drug companies who stand to make a lot of money from treating alcoholism and alcohol-related problems. I wrote a short article on 3 unconventional approaches which you can read here. According to the WHO, there are 3.3 million alcohol-related deaths worldwide as well as a significant impact on the disabilities and poor health of millions of people. Overall, harmful use of alcohol is responsible for 5.1% of the global burden of disease. Many professionals seem convinced we are never really free from alcohol addiction, instead we remain in remission (or “in hiding”) until the day comes when treatments fail or something else happens, which causes us to reach for the booze again. We are never cured. We are all just waiting for our next relapse! My friend believes in all these things too. He also says if either one of us falls back into addiction again, he’ll feel worse than before because now his soul has been taken away from him yet again. Conditioning & Brainwashing So, if alcoholism is not a disease, what is it? Many experts believe that it is a choice and that individuals have free will. But is that really true? Like it or not, we are all conditioned, so whether we have freedom around alcohol has to be questionable. We are conditioned by our parents, by our teachers and schools, by society as a whole and by advertisers. You may think that you haven’t been conditioned when it comes to alcohol, but that is highly unlikely. It’s harsh to say, but like a pedophile grooms kids, you’ve been groomed to accept alcohol. To give you some perspective take a look at the list below to see just how often you are encouraged to drink alcohol. Birth of a baby Announcement of a pregnancy Getting a job Leaving a job At a wake Celebrating the new year Celebrating your birthday Celebrating the birthday of a friend Moving house Buying a house Valentines day Graduating from university Going to university Getting engaged Getting married Getting a pay rise Being made redundant Christmas day Thanksgiving Having some good luck Relaxing on the beach on holiday As you can see from this very tiny list, we have been conditioned to drink at every conceivable, possible life event. But this list is only the tip of the iceberg, because when you are a drinker, every day is a drinking day and e...